Imagine chasing a little ball around a golf course and becoming so proficient at it that you become a world champion, all the while claiming that world is going to end any day, people are going to be destroyed and they must be reached before it's too late ?
Pete Zahut
JoinedPosts by Pete Zahut
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7
Tyler McCumber wins PGA tour event in Peru
by FatFreek 2005 intyler mccumber, no, you probably don't know of him.
he may be one of jehovah's witnesses.
his dad, mark, was a member the last i knew.. .
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Pete Zahut
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28
So getting disfellowshipped sounds kind of great.
by schnell ini grew up in this religion, i was baptized at 14, married at 27, and now i'm 31. i'm also evolutionist and atheist.
i wanted this to be the truth.
i spent years as an apologist trying to reconcile everything.
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Pete Zahut
For your wife's sake, if it's only been recently that you've started missing meetings etc., it might be wise to wait before drawing an official line in the sand. It may be that in time, the JW's in your life will get the picture and back off. If enough time goes by and you play your cards right, you may be able to have the best of both worlds in terms of not being shunned every time you see a JW and having your wife be the object of pity in the congregation. You can send a DA letter in at any old time if you choose to later....why not give fading a try?
You shouldn't have to strategize in order to leave a religion but it is what it is....a cult or at least cult like religion that you've / we've managed to get tied up in. I don't know your situation but for me it was best to little by little fade out and not play the game by their rules by sending in a D A letter. Who are they anyway that I should bother giving notification?? The relationship with God that you once believed in as a JW, was supposed to be between you and him. You don't need to explain anything to anyone. Just vague non committal answers (if that) should keep them off your back. Tempting as it might be, there's no need to give them a piece of your mind spill your guts, explain or justify your personal beliefs to any one of them.
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Have a pretty interesting story to tell.
by Dexter ini am new to this site, was always told by my elder father if the site accidentally appeared on the comp screen it was satans doing.
anyways, i am 28 y/m who had the unfortunate life of being the last of three kids to be born ins.
my oldest sibling lasted about 8 years before she was d,f.
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Pete Zahut
There are plenty of parents who throw their kids out of the house when they get to be so stubborn they won't listen anymore. I'm so sick of hearing like this is some kind of JW thing.
The difference is,JW kids (minors) often get thrown out simply because they don't want to be JW's....don't want to get baptized or go to meetings, not because they are doing anything particularly wrong. I know a family that went to South America to serve where the need was great and their 17 year old didn't want to go. Without giving too much detail here I'll just tell you, their flight stopped in a southern state before leaving the U.S. They dumped their 17 year old off at the airport with no money no place to go and have never heard from their offspring again. They are now missionaries and the 17 year old is in their early 30's, has made a life of their own and wants no contact from family members....even the ones who are no longer JW's themselves.
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JW's know how to guilt trip....
by HereIgo inwhen i left the org, the jw's tried their best to guilt trip me.
some of the questions i was asked and things i was told:.
"how could you possibly be happy outside of jehovah's organization?
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Pete Zahut
Do you really want to see your 3 year old daughter destroyed?"
Back in 1984 when I was newly married and our first son was a newborn, I was missing meetings during the week because I was taking some night school courses to get certifications I need for my job. The Elders came calling on us and warned me of the spiritual dangers of missing meetings and pursuing and education in this time of the end. One of them said "You wouldn't want to have come this far just miss out on everlasting life and have some other man marry your wife and become your son's father would you?"
That guy is dead 15+ years now and the other one was DF'd a decade or more ago for cheating on his wife and 5 kids. Since then the oh so important "Bookstudy" was eliminated and the meeting times have been reduced. I'm still here and my marriage, family (including our 1st grandchild) and employment are intact. In fact, as of last week I can retire early (still in my 50's) and start drawing my pension.
Just sayin"...
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Do JW's ever really grow up ?
by Phizzy ini ask the above because of my personal experience.
as a born-in i was naive, socially inept and had never really thought deeply about anything.. i was also unable to accept arguments based upon reason and facts.. just like a child.. it was only after freeing myself from the mind-control of the jw cult that i educated myself and matured as a person to being (almost) an adult.. jw's attitudes and their inability to debate in any meaningful way, (they could start by actually listening),means they have not grown up..
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Pete Zahut
Like drugs and alcohol, religion can also cause "arrested development" in individuals.
People can cease to progress as individuals once they allow their lives to be heavily influenced or taken over by one or more of the above.
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CO visits me today
by Chook ini'm at home and hear knock on door , i sneak and look i see two men and recognise one voice and go back into lonunge and ask wife ( who is inactive believer) does she want to speak to elders ,she says no ,then literally 3 minutes has pasted another knock the 3 minutes seemed like an eternity.
so brave heart me think fuck it i'll answer ,i invite them in for coffee, i recognise one older man he is a unique elder who i genuinely was fond of when i was in his name is andrew ,the other guy i didn't recognise we will call harry ( not real name australia doesn't have that many cos with his same name).
so i think to myself i will tread lightly and not cause to much of a fuss for the wife's sake, but my personality is very the opposite of treading lightly ,as you read my threads you will realise i'm not timid.
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Pete Zahut
Well done...good logic used.
I did the same thing when a C.O and Elder called on me 3 years after I last attended a meeting. He was shocked that no one had called on us before and by the time I was done with him he didn't know what to say or do. They don't know what to do when someone goes off the script they've rehearsed at the meetings and when someone dares to challenge not only their lame doctrines but also their very authority. Their usual logic and rationalizations no longer apply when that happens.
I never heard a word back from anyone ever again and I suspect you won't either. On some level they know they don't have a leg to stand on and had better stick to the easy marks.
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Refusing blood transfusion: A free choice?
by StephaneLaliberte ini wrote the following in relation to the mother in quebec who died for refusing a blood transfusion.
enjoy.
i personally grew up within the jehovah's witnesses and was a member in good standing until 2013 (aged 35), date at which i became inactive.
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Pete Zahut
This weekend one of my siblings told me that recently someone in their Congregation in Florida, accepted a blood transfusion to save their dying child and there was nothing done about it. Perhaps there was a loophole because it was an unbaptized child who got the blood transfusion. Had the parent accepted the blood for him or herself, there may have been committee action taken. I'm just guessing here but it seems as if anymore, it's getting to be a conscience matter whereas in the past, it definitely wasn't.
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POP QUIZ: You're An Elder, And A Sister Has Suicidal Thoughts...
by pale.emperor inlets imagine you're a jehovah's witness elder.
you have zero theological training aside from what you've read in the watchtower and the currently still approved watchtower publications, you have zero counseling skills, and no medical training.
a recently bereaved sister approaches you in tears and tells you she just wants to die.. what do you do?.
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Pete Zahut
(Option D )
Have her read the book of Job (as I was advised to do ) so she can see how her current problems are really miniscule compared to what Job went through. Have her pray for an extra portion of Jehovah's holy spirit in her life.
Tell her to find comfort when she reads how Jehovah's wise loving solution to the horror and grief job was experiencing over having his 10 children flattend all at once, during a family dinner, was to replace them with 10 new children. She will be comforted to see that Job (despite having lost his family and having his house collapse), forgot his problems as soon as his wife (mother of the original 10) spent the next decade or more being pregnant so that she could provided Job with 10 replacement children.
Once the depressed sisters jumps off the nearest bridge or downs a bottle of pills, she won't be a problem to the elders and everyone can get back to their spiritual paradise.
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18
Love for the Hate
by IronSharpensIron ini just wanted to share a perspective related to my experience with leaving the jw.
at this point, i have been df'd since i was 18. i'm 25, happily married with 2 fantastic children.
after being miserably at odds with my parents and extended family, i've come to some realizations as follows.. i struggled with the conditional nature of my parent's love- talking to me until it bothered their conscience, then cutting me off.
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Pete Zahut
Welcome IronSharpensIron..you are so right....trying to disprove their beliefs and or return shunning for shunning, is a sure way for them to feel justified in their condemnation of you. However there is no harm in establishing boundaries in how they are allowed to treat you and your children. This helps them realize that you and your family are not to be taken for granted and that you are calling the shots....not the Watchtower Society.
I have found it best not to bring the JW topic up to family members and if they ask me something, I give two or three word answers and let them know that anything they want to know that because of the way JW's have set things up, (fear of anyone who disagrees) there is no good way for me to discuss religion with them without it ending badly for me. I tell them that anything they want to know or may have wondered about, is available on line and they have to do their own homework...just like I did.
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Deborah Francis-White Rolls the Dice Series 1 - Episode 2 Offline
by RodrigoGuerreiro inhi the excellent episode about the jws just stopped to be available at bbc i-player.. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b07zhwl7/episodes/guide.
anyone have an alternative link for that particular episode?.
edit: *deborah frances-white.
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Pete Zahut
Great stuff....and very eye opening for any current JW to hear ! Oh how I wish my wife would let me post this on our facebook page but it would be the end of our current family ties as we know them.
New Light... If you're in a dim room and you can't read the pages of your book so you turn up the dimmer switch....the book doesn't turn into a dog, does it ?
- New Light...When you've ruined people's lives but you need them to think it was their own fault.
- New Light...For when you need to blame your followers for following your instructions.
- New Light...If you can't change what you've said...then change what you've said, means
"It would be against my bible trained conscience to answer" (the JW equivalent to pleading the 5th.)